Is my guy going to get back together with his ex?
Hello Lea,
I allow myself to write to you because I live a situation that is beyond me. I am 28 years old, owner.
2 months ago, a girlfriend introduced me to her 24-year-old brother. We had a mutual crush.
He was previously with a 25 year old girl for 1 year they broke up several times in 2-3 months. (Apparently they only do that but still stay together).
They separated 1 week before we got together. We were happy and in love. Words of love, outings, complicity of the never seen, sexually perfect! I have my home, he lives with his parents, during the week we saw each other 2 times at my house and we were every weekend together. He introduced me to part of his family and vice versa. He knows I’m doing this if I’m sure of my feelings and attachment!
At the same time, her ex knew we were together, so she called, sent messages, letters. (Basically he had blocked his number and deleted his facebook! how did he get back in touch ???)
And then one day, after a well-watered evening, he made his immature, making a slight ethyl coma, asthma attack, wanted to get back behind the wheel cuité brief the next morning I was not happy that he did everything _a. Without argument but words exchanged, he leaves after 2 hours of sleep so still under the influence of alcohol. Then more news. I have to send a message to get his apology, he is ashamed. The coming days he is distant, sends me few messages (Ditto for me). I want to see him but he refuses for lack of time. I try in vain.
3 days passed and he did not come. So I cut radio silence for 3 days (Maybe not the best idea) but I wanted him to come and see me! Sunday is coming and there is his sister’s birthday. To say Hello he tries to kiss me I give him a kiss on the cheek like to goodbye. (In between I’m waiting for them to come and see me! but nothing!!)
I learn that he was waiting for me to take the first step! and me the same. I wait until the next morning to call him in vain and I send him a message => no answer. The next day I give him an ultimatum if radio silence I stop and it will be definitive between him and me. From the beginning I reveal to him my feelings never expressed! He reacts the next morning by asking me if I am okay, that he apologizes for not having answered but that he does not know where he is !! it takes me time. I answer okay we may have been too fast and I prefer that he really knows what he wants! ( Is my guy going to get back together with his ex? (
Today 1 week after this request. I do not give news but his sister calls his ex (And I listen to the conversation), because the gentleman is silent radio to his parents and sisters. (That he did not do with me, very weird we can not understand him) We learn from this girl that they see each other again but that they want to take the time to get back together so as not to repeat the same mistakes, that she knows that he was with someone (So me) but that she did everything to get him back because she loves him and does not blame him! Apparently they would have spent the weekend together (This girl is not appreciated by anyone, and he hides her from the eyes of his family).
Today what should I do? or Nothing? (I await his news); I make a letter? I have no idea. I would need you to clear me up, I know the power of a woman when she wants something! Then having experienced this while being younger it will not bring them anything! But in the end I can’t do anything? I care about him but I won’t get on my knees to keep him going! especially 2 months of happiness without dispute to get there! What to do? or do nothing?
According to his sister: This weekend apparently he goes to the 24H of Le Mans motorcycle with 2 people from his family but he has not booked for his EX / or new girlfriend
HELP ME STP
Thank you in advance.
Is my guy going to get back together with his ex?
My answer:
Hello Julie,
I hope that I do not arrive after the storm and that this article can serve you and enlighten you on your situation. I will come back to several points:
- Its immaturity
- His ex
- The advice I can give you
Its immaturity ( Is my guy going to get back together with his ex? )
I base myself solely on the elements I have, that is to say, your email and therefore your perception of things.
It goes without saying that this boy looks quite immature. This would also be explained by his age and situation, as well as your difference: he is young, younger than you (it is often said that women are more mature than men in general, so when there is a small age gap, it can be all the more so), he lives with his parents, you are autonomous and owner, he is completely dependent on his ex, you are free and independent.
He separated only a week before from his ex to get with you, so you had to suspect the consequences. Such a quick and brutal separation sometimes revives emotions, including the famous feeling of “I still love him maybe we haven’t finished our story”. The proof is, he tells you that he deleted it from Facebook (something he had to do to please you and to show his independence) but finally he is still in contact with her… It starts badly level confidence.
You both wait for the other to take the first step. You, you wait for it to be him because you think he is wrong and expect it to be you.
His ex ( Is my guy going to get back together with his ex? )
Her ex is still attached to him: she knows he’s with you but don’t blame him. This shows the unhealthy nature of their relationship. Not to mention that they have already left each other several times. Their relationship will end one day for good but I’m not sure that day has come.
They are both very fragile and do not know what they want. Even if they no longer love each other, they persuade themselves otherwise. Maybe for fear of loneliness, fear of being alone and having to start all over again.
His ex is not appreciated by the family, unlike you. But you’re not going to be able to hang on to a story again and again that, for the moment, hangs by a thread.
My advice
You cannot give yourself body and soul to a man who is not sure of himself. I don’t even say “sure of his feelings” because even if he loves you sincerely, he is not clear with himself at the moment. He can’t play on both sides and let you wait for him nicely. If today you still have no news, I advise you to write him a letter in which you will explain your attachment but your doubts about the proper functioning of your relationship.
Write him a letter without reproach, without being brutal, a sweet letter that proves your tenderness and your retreat. Tell him that although you are really attached to him, you cannot continue to build a story on such an unser solid foundation, that as long as his ex is behind you like this and he, meets his expectations, you will not be able to trust him.
Hoping to have helped you,
