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My guy keeps in touch with his ex

This is something almost inevitable in a relationship: one day or another, your exes will come to interfere in your relationship. Whether it’s just because they are mentioned at the turn of a conversation, or because one of you always keeps in touch with one of his exes…

Their appearance in the life of a couple can have two consequences: strengthen your relationship, or destroy it. It all depends on how you approach the situation. “My guy keeps in touch with his ex: what to do?” Here’s to help you manage the situation:

1/ If your ex keeps in touch with his ex, it will be necessary to take stock

Above all, I wanted to break a preconceived idea:


Even if it is quite rare that the fact that your darling remains friends with his ex is compatible with your relationship, it is still a possible scenario. To do this, it requires maturity on the part of the three parties, a lot of maturity: You, him, and his ex. Maturity and transparency:

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My guy keeps in touch with his ex: what to do?
 if the page is definitively turned between the two, and his ex is well aware that he is now in a relationship, then this situation is perfectly viable. But again, trust and communication must be paramount in these kinds of situations. This is not within the reach of all couples.

In normal times, therefore, this kind of situation is delicate. Indeed, when an ex remains friends with your guy, there is a very fine line between what is appropriate, and what is not. 

And very often in history, there will always be someone jealous. You or his ex usually. Whether it’s because of the time spent with her/with you, the little physical attentions he gives her/you, or the favors he does to her/you.


2/ Are there any concrete reasons for your guy to keep in touch with his ex? Extenuating circumstances?

However, this friendship between your guy and his ex must also be highlighted through different factors. There may be exceptions! Especially if he and his ex were friends since elementary school, friends long before they dated, or if their two families are very close.

Similarly, context can play a role for many. Do they see each other? If so, do they do it frequently? And what do they do together in this case? Do they go out in groups with mutual friends? Or do they just have dinner together/Do they watch series alone on the couch? In the second case, it already smells much more like the roussi…

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My guy keeps in touch with his ex: what to do?

 Either way, follow your instincts. If something doesn’t seem normal to you, seems inappropriate, incorrect, indecent, then it probably is! And this, even if your guy does not necessarily realize it… So it’s up to you to act!

Because inevitably, if your guy and his ex get too close again, one of the two (or both!) may end up developing feelings for the other.


3/ The thing to do if your guy keeps in touch with his ex

The best thing to do, which is also the simplest and smartest? Talk to him aboutit. Explain that this situation bothers you, and how it bothers you. Without making him a scene! No, calmly. Tell him that if you matter to him, if he really loves you, then he must stop.

If your darling refuses to listen to you, or to understand, that he says that there is absolutely no risk in continuing to maintain friendly contact with his ex, then it is up to you to see, to make a choice. My guy keeps in touch with his ex: what to do?

Either you decide to leave him, explaining that the fact that he decides to continue seeing her is incompatible with your conception of a relationship. Either you trust him, and you tell him that, as long as things stay at the point where they are, you accept to live like this.

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4/ The thing not to do if your guy keeps in touch with his ex

Tell him that you agree with the situation, but behind it, hold some grudge against your guy, and bring out the story from your next argument. It’s silly, immature, and destructive to you, him, and therefore your relationship. No, say things clearly and truthfully.

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Tell him how you really feel, and make sure the message is well received. The best way to do this in this kind of situation is definitely to be as direct as possible about your desires!



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