Bandage relationship, buffer relationship, doudou relationship, kleenex relationship. So many pretty names to designate a harmful relationship that is forged too quickly to fill an emotional void. It is a short relationship that occurs quickly after a break-up of a long relationship. The person who engages in this new relationship feels ready to invest.
Then after a while, she realizes that she has not had time to recover from her previous relationship, that she may need to be alone and she breaks off the new relationship. How do you know if you are in a relationship like this? Did you create it? Do you suffer it? Relationship bandage, the 6 signs that you are right in it.
Relationship dressing, what is it?
This short relationship is a relationship that makes it possible to “bandage” the previous break. Hence the term bandage relationship. One might think that the person acts in this way out of ease, out of fear of being alone, to forget his ex or all that mixed up. And this is often true. But this process can be unconscious at first as the desire to believe in it is strong.
Become a bandage relationship, a kleenex relationship, it can happen to all of us. We are simply in the wrong place, at the wrong time, with the wrong person. That’s all.
When we don’t feel safe in ourselves, we look for a solution quickly outside of us.
This is the famous need of the doudou, the miracle solution, the savior. The problem is that sometimes where you think you have found the partner of your life, you are disillusioned. What for? Because we are more in love with love than with the person we have in front of us. We rushed to the superficial qualities that we thought we perceived without taking the time to know the person in depth.
In the era of dating sites, this trend is multiplying. We seek above all to validate the physical cohesion before really knowing the other. As if we had to check only the desire before seeing if the rest sticks.
Bandage relationship: who is the bandage of the other?
If we chain romantic relationships at full speed and without pause, we risk falling into the phenomenon of the bandage relationship. Either you are looking for a bandage partner because you can’t stand the post-breakup grief period. Either you are a bandage partner for someone else.
This type of relationship can expose you to serious disappointments.
Your partner can leave overnight without warning, characterized by the technique of ghosting. He may return with his ex or realize that you don’t suit him because he hasn’t finished grieving. Or, on the contrary, he ended his mourning and he is getting better, and where you idealized this relationship, for him it was just a solution to an emotional and carnal lack. It is also not uncommon to see emotionally dependent people, who are afraid of loneliness or abandonment and therefore have a huge need for love and gratitude, rushing into these relationships. They are a real gear.
Bandage relationship: the 6 signs that you are right in it
The 6 signs that you are right in it are: (Relationship dressing)
1) You get excited
You believe you have found love as soon as you meet someone who you like physically and who is interested. As soon as there is reciprocity, you go headlong. In a hurry, you confuse attraction and relationship, love and desire to live a story. You go too fast and you make movies.
2) No break between your relationships
Your stories follow one another without a period of mourning in love. Besides, it is not a question of love story but of liaisons and adventures as it remains superficial and does not last. You want to believe it even if deep down you know that you are burying your head in the sand.
3) Turn the page faster (Relationship dressing)
The previous relationship was so complicated or ended so badly that we want to forget it as soon as possible. And we may have the impression that if we remain alone, we will not be able to combat this situation in the best possible way. So we decide to get back together as a couple to turn our negative emotions into positive waves. If for some people, the intention is good, most of the time, the work of mourning in love is obviously not done. And even worse, these people have actually not forgotten their ex and just want to take revenge or stir up the jealousy of their previous dating partner.
4) A flash in the pan on his part
Here it is the opposite, it is no longer you who are excited but the person met. She tells you about love at first sight but comes out of a long relationship and has not yet completely turned the page. His excitement and infatuation are in fact just a flash in the pan that will fall in a few weeks. The grand declarations after a few days, the suffocating sweet words, a projection from the outset. It’s often too much and it lacks sincerity.
It’s a relationship that’s often passionate at first but ends badly. Because it was actually a game of feelings more than a real passion. For the need to reassure oneself, to test oneself at the expense of the harm done to the other.
Other signs of a bandage relationship (Relationship dressing)
5) A relationship for lack of better
Serve as a crutch, a hobby or, more unhealthy, a point of comparison to better digest his breakup with his ex. That’s what it’s like to be in the middle of a band-aid relationship. This allows the one who creates it to find comfort. It is sometimes unconscious, without seeking to do harm but being selfish in spite of everything and clumsy. Some knowingly use the other the time to mourn in love by abusing their time, their kindness, their affection. By sharing intimate moments above all, lightness, ephemerality. They take advantage of a person available in case of a blues hit or a temporary desire.
But this relationship for lack of better, out of spite, often engages only one person, it is illusory.
Without feelings or sincerity. If you behave like this or feel that your relationship is stagnating, that it does not go beyond your bed and stolen moments, that you give a lot but the other nothing, then you are in a bandaged relationship. Sometimes she can also be called sex friends or “friends with profits”. But without one of the partners consenting to this lack of feelings. It is above all an unbalanced relationship.
6) An absence of feelings (Relationship dressing)
No matter how much you try to convince yourself, experience sensations, in the end they do not last. They do not turn into emotions, let alone feelings. Too disappointed in the past, after too many disappointments, sorrows, the disappointments are slipping on you now. If you still embark on a relationship after a meeting, deep down, it is only a shame.
You have to take stock of your emotions, you are not ready to open your heart again.
In order not to live a bandaged relationship, nor to create it nor to undergo it, one must know how to take the time to mourn one’s past. It is a sign of emotional maturity. Respect yourself and be with a person who respects you, a person who does not seek to play, to fill a gap. We can all fall into a bandage relationship one day, whether we create it or undergo it. We all have the right to be wrong.
The whole thing is not to repeat the same mistake because it has two direct consequences. Hurt the person who believed in this relationship and make you suffer as well. Because then you lose sight of your feelings and therefore what a romantic relationship really is.
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