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Topics to start a conversation with a lady

What topics of conversation to have with a girl when you meet? How to interest him during a first meeting, a first date  or even an exchange on a site or a dating application? And next ? What can we talk about to avoid such annoying blanks? Obviously, the important thing is to remain yourself, natural and authentic, and if possible, spontaneous. 

But with stress, shyness, it’s not always easy. That’s why we have compiled for you in this article the list of 22 effective and captivating conversation topics to have with a girl. 

With all these ideas, it’s impossible not to find something to discuss! That’s what not to see the time pass by getting to know each other.


Topics for conversation with a girl: 22 effective and captivating topics

You have a date with a girl you like . You are really interested in knowing more about her. But stress or shyness may take over and you are afraid of not knowing what to say, of remaining silent in front of her, paralyzed by stage fright .

What if she’s in the same condition as you? So there, you both risk playing the king of silence for a long time…

It’s never easy when you meet someone. Between the banalities that we want to avoid, the blunders or blunders and the too personal subjects not to be tackled right away, you are afraid of making a mistake. 

And this also applies to a first approach and a follow-up exchange on a dating site.


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Knowing how to ask open questions , listen to the answers, bounce back , listen to it but also talk about yourself by revealing yourself a little.

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The important thing with these topics of conversation is that they allow you to create a bond , the desire to know more but in a reciprocal logic . The idea is to have a dialogue, and absolutely not a monologue on his part.

What topics of conversation with a girl can you bring up then? And how to develop them thanks to a list of open questions? Questions you can ask a girl over text or one-on-one.

These topics are neither too general nor too intrusive  ; most of the time, we all have something to say. Once you’ve found a topic of conversation that he likes, continue discussing that topic and let things take their toll. If a topic runs out, casually jump to another. 


1 News (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

This subject may seem banal or generalist, but we are not saying that we should talk to him about the weather! No, the idea is to develop current topics in all areas. Political, social, economic, environmental, cultural, sporting …

It’s a way for you to see if she has her feet rooted in reality, if she is interested in the world around her, if she is interested in a subject specifically.

  1. What do you think of the current crisis?
  2. Are you going to vote in the next election?
  3. The ecological cause, what do you think?
  4. Do you understand something about the conflict…?
  5. What is the subject that you think is not covered enough by the press?

2 His childhood

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

This topic of conversation allows you to bring back to your interlocutor childhood memories and the emotions that go with them. You can also make assumptions or tease her using the place where she spent her childhood (tease her about her accent, her expressions…).

  1. Where did you grow up?
  2. What was it like growing up there?
  3. Were you a pretty good student in school?
  4. Were you more Barbie or Playmobil?
  5. Have you kept in touch with childhood friends?

3 Travel: one of the essential topics of conversation with a girl!

travel and universal

Travel is a great topic of conversation to get to know each other. Everyone likes to talk about the trips they have had the chance to do, it brings back memories and positive emotions. 

The interest of this subject, it is also that it allows to approach other interesting subjects, such as the kitchen, what type of traveler she is (rather nature, adventure, culture, etc…). And also to talk about the places she would like to go.

  1. What was your last destination?
  2. Where would you dream of going?
  3. Which country was your favorite to visit?
  4. Rather organized trip or road trip  ?
  5. Your best travel memory?
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4 What she does in her spare time

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

A classic subject, but effective since it allows you to talk about your passions, hobbies, centers of interest, activities outside your studies or work. Once again, this allows, depending on what she likes in life, to bounce back on lots of different things: sport, culture, art, volunteering…

  1. Do you practice a sports activity?
  2. Do you like to dance ?
  3. The program for your ideal weekend?
  4. Rather cinema, theater, exhibitions?
  5. Do you prefer spending time alone or do you see your friends a lot?

5 Sports (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

gym Topics to start a conversation with a lady
Topics to start a conversation with a lady

This is a topic that allows you to dig deeper into the previous topic. This allows you to see if you have the same tastes in terms of sports activities. To see if she likes sport for relaxation or competition , if she has team spirit. Maybe so to plan for a next appointment?

  1. What is your favorite sport ?
  2. Do you practice regularly?
  3. Which team are you a fan of?
  4. What is the last sporting event you participated in?
  5. Have you ever practiced a thrilling sport?

6 Television

Television one of the Topics to start a conversation with a lady

Easy subject to address there too, screens occupying a lot of our lives. If she does not watch television, she may be addicted to series, to a particular type of film. This will let you know how to spend an evening in “chill” mode with her if you see her again.

  1. What is your favorite movie ?
  2. Your favorite series?
  3. Addicted to Netflix  ? Disney Plus?
  4. What kind of movies do you prefer?
  5. Do you often watch TV (news, shows, reality TV)?

7 Books (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

Does she like reading  ? Is it one of those favorite activities or just a pastime on a deckchair on vacation? If she particularly likes books, in plaid and sofa mode and bookstores and libraries are her favorite places, here is a subject to dig into.

  1. Do you like reading ?
  2. What kind of literature do you prefer?
  3. The title of the last book you read?
  4. What books can you recommend to me?
  5. Your favorite author

8 His musical tastes

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

There too, there is material to develop the subject according to his tastes and yours. You can bounce on the music playing if you are in a bar for example. Or discover his universe if you don’t necessarily have the same tastes.

  1. What music do you listen to?
  2. Your favorite artist?
  3. The last concert you went to?
  4. Do you play an instrument ?
  5. What kind of emotions are you looking for through music?

9 The kitchen

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

This is a subject that allows you to know a little better about your daily life and know what your tastes are for a future appointment at the restaurant, for example! Maybe she likes baking, the cuisine of a particular country.

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  1. What is your favorite food ?
  2. Do you like cooking ?
  3. Do you prefer to eat at home or in a restaurant?
  4. What do you hate to eat?
  5. What is the dish you cook the best?

10 Pets (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)


It’s not necessarily a subject on which you can spend hours unless of course if she has an animal and she’s crazy about it! A dog, a cat? An exotic animal?

  1. Do you have pets ?
  2. If so, what is his name?
  3. Are you more of a dog or a cat?
  4. Are you allergic to an animal?
  5. Are you afraid of certain animals?

Other conversation starters to have with a girl

11 His studies

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

If your interlocutor is a student and you feel that her studies are important to her, you can spend some time on this subject. This also allows you to deviate on her professional projects , what she plans for her future or even if she does a little job on the side.

  1. What do you study ?
  2. Do you like it?
  3. What do you want to do with this degree?
  4. Is it a difficult course?
  5. Have you always wanted to do this?

12 His professional life (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

Topics to start a conversation with a lady profession

Work is an important part of all of our lives, we spend a lot of time there. Whether you do a passionate job or not, there are always things to tell. Anecdotes , stories between colleagues. A promotion, a job change, a raise…

  1. What is your job?
  2. How long have you been working there?
  3. What are you doing exactly ?
  4. Do you like what you do?
  5. How are your colleagues?

13 His family

family Topics to start a conversation with a lady

The famous theme of the family, it can be a double-edged sword depending on its agreement with its parents in particular. However, it is essential for you to know what kind of relationship she has with her family and what place it holds in her life. This will give you important information about his way of life, values ​​and principles.

  1. Do you have any siblings ?
  2. Are you close to your parents?
  3. Do you often see your family?
  4. Do you have any family traditions?
  5. What’s the best advice your parents gave you?

14 Her best childhood memories

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

This is a good topic of discussion to make him relive emotions related to his childhood. By inviting him to talk to you about it, you lead him to scroll through his head with good memories. And so, she enthusiastically engages in the conversation.

  1. What did you love to do when you were little?
  2. Your best vacation memory?
  3. From school?
  4. With family ?
  5. What do you miss the most from that time?

15 Her childhood dreams

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

little girl reading a book with a Teddy bear on the floor in a cozy living room at home, beautiful emotions, the concept of relaxation and friendship

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Again, it is an excellent subject of conversation to bring him to remember good memories. To know how little she was. And then you can follow up on her dreams , realized or not, and the life projects she wants to achieve today.

  1. What did you dream of doing as a child?
  2. What dream did you realize?
  1. Did you have a friend or an imaginary world?
  2.  What did you dream of doing bigger?
  3. What do you miss the most from this period?

16 Her style  (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

If she has a strong, personal style, tattoos , piercings , or special jewelry , you can bring that up during the conversation. Rock, bohemian, classic, relaxed? You can thus take the opportunity to give him compliments , but without insisting too much on his physical appearance.

  1. Why did you choose this tattoo? What does it mean ?
  2. How many piercings/tattoos do you have?
  3. Do you wear makeup every day?
  4. What is your perfume?
  5. What outfit are you most comfortable in?

17 Her style of men: one of the topics of conversation with a girl to find out what she wants!

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

There, you enter a little more into the heart of the matter , slipping into a casual game of seduction to find out more about her kind of men. This will allow you to know if you can match you according to her criteria, what she likes, wants, doesn’t want anymore…

  1. Do you have a particular type of man?
  2. Which criterion is unacceptable?
  3. What qualities are essential for you?
  4. And what faults do you hate?
  5. What caught your attention about me?

18 The important moments of his life

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

This subject allows you to share special, important, authentic , sometimes even intimate moments of life depending on how easy it is to reveal itself to you. This can establish a bond and a climate of trust, to create a connection between the two of you.

  1. Your greatest pride ?
  2. Your biggest shame?
  3. Your best memory ?
  4. What matters most to you?
  5. What made you cry?

19 His fears (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

There too, it is a question of confidences , from the lightest (the fear of spiders or vertigo for example) to the most difficult to manage ( the fear of abandonment , rejection, etc.) when it affects the emotional . An effective subject of conversation to exchange and also confide in you, to let him glimpse your vulnerable side.

  1. Do you have any fears?
  2. Phobias? If so, what are they?
  3. Do you have nightmares?
  4. What is your biggest fear?
  5. What do you do when you’re not well?

20 Her fantasies

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

These are not necessarily intimate fantasies, but fantasies in general . It would be premature to bring up intimate topics too quickly, even if obviously you are both free to exchange at the pace you want together. 

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By definition, a fantasy is an  “imaginary scenario representing the realization of a desire” , so the subject can be vast.

  1. For you, what is the difference between a dream and a fantasy?
  1. If you could have what you want right now, what would it be?
  2. What is your biggest fantasy for your life as a couple?
  3. Do you have naughty fantasies?
  4. Have you ever realized some of your fantasies?

21 Her exes (Topics to start a conversation with a lady)

This conversation topic can be smart depending on how you approach it. What you absolutely must not do is that it put you in the friendzone box because you are playing the confidant. You have to position yourself well, this will automatically dissociate you from the category of his exes. By feeling understood , she will give way to a bond between you.

  1. How long was your longest relationship?
  2. What was your worst date?
  3. What turns you on in a man?
  4. What do you never want to experience again?
  5. Do you have any regrets about your romantic past?

22 His plans for the future

Topics to start a conversation with a lady

What are his short, medium and long term projects? Personally, professionally? What does she like to do to have fun, relax, discover? What really makes her dream, vibrate?

  1. What are your plans for the weekend?
  2. Where are you going to spend your next vacation?
  3. What are you going to do interesting this week?
  4. Where do you see yourself in 2, 5, 10 years?
  5. What are your ideal life plans and couple plans ?

BONUS topics of conversation with a girl: children (to be discussed only in certain cases)

If you both have children, you can discuss this topic as single parents . This gives you something in common and it is an important subject. On the other hand, if only one of you has a child or if none of you has one, avoid this theme! 

These kinds of topics are premature if you don’t have kids and it’s your first date.

  1. How old is your son/daughter (or children)?
  2. What grade are they in ?
  3. How is custody?
  4. Is it going well with his/her father?
  5. Do you want other children?

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