Can we love without passion?
Love is often praised as a passionate. its a strong, stunning feeling of desire and lack. We are told about love at first sight. love at first sight but the birth of the feeling of love as something necessarily intense and as if obvious.
Is that what love is all the time? To fall in love, is it necessarily to lose one’s mind, to know the confusion of the senses, to be overwhelmed with emotions, to experience strong feelings quickly?
Do the beginnings of a romantic relationship have to be synonymous with all this? If it is not obvious, does it mean that we are not, that we will not fall in love? Should love be obvious from the outset? Can we love without love passion? Is a beginning of a relationship possible without passion?
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Can we love without passion? Is a beginning of a relationship possible without passion?
The range of sensations at the beginning of a relationship
To start a story with someone is to feel the desire. Curiosity, physical attraction, commonalities, there is something that pushes us to try the adventure. There are relationships that start slowly and others that are much more passionate like those originating from a love at first sight. Are the seconds the ones that will last? (Can we love without passion?)
When we meet, the first glance and the first exchange are often indicative of the future. We often talk about physical attraction, which we associate with a love at first sight or even a crush. We often confuse this desire with feelings, we experience a certain vulnerability of the senses in front of the other, an uncontrollable connection that leads us to think that it is perhaps him, perhaps her and we tend to attach ourselves very quickly when the simple sight of the other makes us stir, making the heart pulsate and sparkle the look
On the other hand, we can get to know someone slowly, over time, without having experienced at the first meeting this sensory euphoria. (Can we love without passion?)
Without obviously experiencing disgust or rejection in front of the other, one does not know the instinctive and uncontrollable sensation of an obvious physical desire. If we had met this person by chance, we would surely not have stopped on him because the first very instinctive reaction, that of attraction, would not have taken place. It is often the reverse process that occurs with this kind of encounter: the person is part of our entourage from near or far and it is by getting to know him, by discovering him, by appreciating him that we can wonder if there could have been or could be something other than politeness, camaraderie, friendship. The famous “what if?”
Do tenderness and affection necessarily rhyme with Luke warmness in a relationship?(Can we love without passion?)
Some will say that if you do not feel anything from the outset or if the relationship was born on friendly bases, then you should look no further. That if there was no obvious attraction at the beginning, the desire will not come and it will be impossible for the feeling of love to blossom. We then think of the ambiguity that sometimes exists, we ask ourselves the question of male/female friendship. For some it is an impossible thing, for others it is common. How do you know if a nascent relationship can and should only remain friendly or if time can change the perception of things, can change sensations into emotions and then feelings?
Not experiencing a raw, instinctive desire for the other, being lulled by a mixture of affection and tenderness, is it only synonymous with eternal friendship? Or can it instead lead the relationship to a future of love story? (Can we love without passion?)
Tenderness and affection are part of the feeling of love, yet they do not seem sufficient to talk about love. We denounce their luke warmness, their lack of passion. Being well with someone, sharing moments of complicity, interests and common points, is it not on the contrary the beginnings of a budding love?
Love settles down over time but it would seem that for many to fall in love is something that happens quickly, without hindsight or control. If the relationship is built on other bases, less intense perhaps, but nevertheless sincere, isn’t love still possible?
Can we love without falling in love, without passion?
It is possible not to know the great impulses of the heart, not to have known love at first sight so often quoted without not being able to love. Falling in love is a state that serves no purpose over the duration of a relationship if you do not like it day after day, if you remain at the stage of love at first sight, of desire. Of course, the passion can last. Some couples have passionate, fusional histories, it is their way of functioning, their way of expressing their feelings. This demonstration of the feeling of love that appears more intense is not more solid than that of a couple who build on a more discreet love, who took the time to settle down, who mixes the feeling of love on a daily basis on other bases, who built their couple gently in a less ostentatious way perhaps but over time.
Attention, passion and tenderness are not for all that opposing notions, on the contrary they even complement each other very well. (Can we love without passion?)
A passionate couple shows tenderness in the same way that a less fusional couple can live moments of passion. Only these two models of couples are built differently. Originally, it was more or less opposite sensations, on the one hand as an obvious, on the other as an adaptation to the other, that allowed the feeling of love to be born and love to develop.
In fact, the essential thing to remember above all, the only universal truth is that there are many forms of love and many ways to love.