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stages of a narcissistic power take-up

Narcissistic perverts are perhaps the worst beings that exist in this world given their inability to feel any empathy and question themselves. I know that many of you have lived or are still living with a narcissistic pervert and that you are suffering excruciatingly. Feel free to reread my article on how to get rid of a narcissistic pervert by the way! I even made you a sample letter to leave a narcissistic pervert.

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The 5 stages of a narcissistic power take-up

Today, we will focus on the seizure of power by narcissistic perverts. How do they get their way? What are their methods? How do they do this? It feels like a surgical operation. That’s about it… A surgical operation of the soul.

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Also, to write you this article, I used a very small book extremely well done on the subject (and yet I read some!). It costs less than 3 € and is very complete:

Step 1: Seduction (stages of a narcissistic power take-up)

The victims of the narcissistic pervert are often the same. These are people who are sorely lacking in self-confidence, who are not aware of their potential. People who are often in the grip of depression or who have just come out of a difficult period.

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This is where the narcissistic pervert comes into play: he will make the other believe that he is the ideal partner. Showing himself at his best, he will make believe that he is full of empathy and benevolence. Under his lamb costume, there is actually a monster ready to suck you all your life.

He will therefore pretend to be prince charming: he will promise you mountains and wonders, buy you lots of pretty things overpriced, in short, he will make you live a little dream. Very short-lived.

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Step 2: Operation Love Bombing (stages of a narcissistic power take-up)

Love bombing, which literally means love bombing, is the first technique used by the narcissistic pervert. It is a method of mind manipulation that results in an intense display of love and interest on the part of an individual towards a person (target).

In the early days of the relationship, he will praise you. He will tell you that you are not only beautiful but also brilliant, interesting, full of humor… In short, he will make you believe that in his eyes, you are the perfect woman. Basically, it tell you word for word what you want or even need to hear. Indeed, he spotted your flaws from the start. And in particular, your lack of self-confidence. He therefore pretends to fill these gaps with his love. Obviously, in reality, he is unable to love.

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The narcissistic pervert is a real chameleon, he will adapt perfectly to what you want to hear or do. He will know what language of love to adopt with you: whether it is words, gifts, services

The goal of this second step is simply to lower the victim’s guard by putting him in confidence. With me you will never be alone again..

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Step 3: Lies and manipulation (stages of a narcissistic power take-up)

During the period of seduction, he will listen carefully to everything his victim has to say to him. Especially when she confides in him her problems. Because he will use these flaws to destroy it afterwards.

And, to be sure that his victim falls totally into the trap and succumbs to the seduction operation, the narcissistic pervert presents himself as a victim. It can invent a past that never happened.

Examples: I experienced a terrible depression, I almost died! / My parents were beating me / My ex is completely crazy she screwed me up.

Once he has succeeded in his coup, that is, his victim has completely entered into emotional dependence, he will begin his process of destruction.

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Step 4: Guilt (stages of a narcissistic power take-up)

The narcissistic pervert will start throwing you little peaks that will sow doubt in your mind.

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Examples: I who had never said anything to anyone before, I wonder if I did well to confide in you… / How can you doubt me? All I do is because I love you

The victim, confused, will begin to feel guilty and try to change, to improve, without really knowing what or how to do.

The narcissistic pervert during this stage will alternate between destruction and valorization… The victim’s nightmare has only just begun.

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Step 5: Isolation (stages of a narcissistic power take-up)

The narcissistic pervert will take care to isolate his victim by cutting him off from all his loved ones. He can even mount it against his family or friends. He will be jealous or even possessive.

The consequences of this mental hold are of several kinds. First of all, the loss of self-esteem but also, the appearance of disorders.

Jean-Philippe Parquet, a psychiatrist specializing in mental control, has established an analysis grid to identify whether a person is under mental influence.

At least 5 of the following criteria must be found to carry the diagnosis of mental control:

  • An imposed break with the previous modalities of behaviors, conducts, judgments and values.
  • An occultation of the previous landmarks and a break in the coherence of the previous life of the subject (acceptance by a person that his personality is shaped by the subjections of a third person which leads to a general and permanent delegation to an imposed model).
  • Unconditional, emotional, behavioural, intellectual, moral and social adherence and allegiance to a person, group or institution. This leads to demanding and complete loyalty, absolute obedience, fear and acceptance of sanctions. An impossibility to believe possible, to return to a previous way of life or to choose alternatives given the imposed certainty that the new way of life is the only legitimate one.
  • complete, progressive and extensive provision of the entirety of his person to a person, group or institution.
  • Increased sensitivity over time to ideas, concepts and prescriptions proposed by a person (group or institution).
  • Dispossession of a person’s skills accompanied by emotional anesthesia as well as impaired judgment.
  • An alteration of freedom of choice.
  • An imperviousness to the opinions, attitudes and values of the environment that make it impossible for the subject to question himself and promote change.
  • Induction and performance of acts seriously prejudicial to the person, acts that were previously not part of the life of the subject. These acts are no longer perceived as harmful or contrary to the values and lifestyles usually accepted in our society.
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