My parents don’t want me to get back together with my ex
Your mother was clear: he does not have the right to set foot at home. Your father, for his part, dreams of having him in front of him to tell him everything he thinks of him. In short, your parents don’t want you to get back together with your ex. So you see it in secret, and don’t dare to formalize the relationship.
So it’s normal to be afraid to disappoint them, afraid of being judged and rejected by the people who matter most to you. It’s also normal to fear that your relationship won’t work again, and that they tell you “you see, we told you so!”
Because surely you want your parents to be proud of you, to support you in your decisions.
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My parents don’t want me to get back together with my ex: here’s the attitude to adopt to make things go as smoothly as possible.
Putting yourself in their place to understand them
Try to put yourself in the shoes of your parents for a moment, to understand their reluctance. They have their reasons (good or not) for no longer wanting your ex in your life: infidelity, violence, unexpected breakup etc.
Know that their goal is most certainly to protect you above all.
Indeed, it is difficult for a parent to see his child suffer, so the parent tends to want to distance the origin of the suffering in every possible way.
Also, it is known that “love makes you blind”. (My parents don’t want me to get back together with my ex)
So they surely think that only feelings make you stay with this person, because they think to see him/her as he/she is: a person harmful to their child.
Finally, keep in mind that your parents have the right not to appreciate it. It is certainly difficult to be in a relationship with someone who is not loved by our family, but it is not with our parents that we make our life.
Know how to communicate in the right way
Come on, we breathe a good shot, and we find the courage to tell them the news. You will get there, I believe in you!
It is possible that your parents do not want to receive your ex at home right away, or that they do not want to meet him anymore.
This is where you will have to use your talents as a mediator, without losing all your energy to the task. For example, there is no point in trying to convince them that Steve has changed in the last week, because they are unlikely to believe you.
On the other hand, show them that you know what you are doing, that you have your head on your shoulders, and that you know what you want. Show them that they can trust you about the decisions you make for you.
My parents don’t want me to get back together with my ex
The objective here is not to enter into the conflict, but to know how to defend your dear and tender with maturity and firmness.
Tell them that you know that he/she is not perfect, that you are aware of it, and that indeed he/she has made you suffer in the past. However, you also know that he is a good person, and you are ready to give him a second chance because you love him deeply. The calmer and more honest you are, the better it will pass!
Detaching themselves from their opinion
Know how to take a step back
It’s important that you know how to sort things out about what your parents are blaming your ex for.
It is possible that finally they “open their eyes” by helping you leave a toxic relationship, which does not suit you. But the opposite can also happen: that they take you away from a person who suits you today, even if he is not perfect and does not correspond to the ideal son-in-law/ daughter-in-law.
Your parents do not hold the truth, they do not know your couple like you. They don’t know your ex the way you know him/her. Then you have no reason to be influenced by their words.
In addition, your parents may judge your ex according to their own preconceptions. For example, they can’t stand people who have tattoos because “it’s bad kind”; or they have always worked hard in their lives, so they don’t understand that your ex can go through a period of unemployment etc.
Cut the cord (My parents don’t want me to get back together with my ex)
Only you know what is good for you. You may be used to following Dad’s advice and listening to Mom,but then it’s time for you to take on your own choices, regardless of their opinion from your parents.
Put aside your ego in this story. You know you’re taking a risk by getting in a relationship with your ex again, but if you feel the risk is worth it, go for it.
What is the biggest risk in the end: that of antagonizing your father, or that of potentially losing the man/woman in your life?
Regaining their trust gradually
Now it’s up to you and your ex to show your parents that this relationship can work on new foundations. It is not with words, but with deeds, that one can hope to regain someone’s trust.
And trust is gained over time, so you’re going to have to be patient. Only time and the small efforts of everyday life can bring about harmony again in the relationship between your parents and your ex.
Finally, if your parents see you happy, fulfilled, there is a good chance that they will lower their guards little by little.
Conclusion: My parents don’t want me to get back together with my ex
Finally, what is the most important thing for you today: to follow the will of your parents or to follow your heart?
See this ordeal as an opportunity to learn to stand on your own two feet, assume your choices as an adult and become fully Master of your life.
