Taking a break with your couple
I often hear that the “break”, the “break” in a couple is synonymous with a close break. True, it always takes place at an obscure moment in the relationship but isn’t it there to save it? Is it possible to save your couple through a cut, a physical distance? Aren’t there different forms of station wagon? What provisions is the person proposing it in and how should the person who has it imposed react? And most importantly, how to take a break so that it works? So how to take a break with your couple and what are the rules?
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Taking a break with your couple: How long? What are the rules? Positive testimony
To take a break, it is essential to be honest with yourself but especially with the other. If you want to take a break, it is to reflect on your couple, to see the damage caused by time or other natural phenomena (or not), source of degradation within your relationship.
We don’t take a break to test a new relationship with Michel and come back with Pierre a few days later because you’ll have realized that in the end, it’s better with him!!! If you want to break up with your friend, don’t be cowardly, tell him instead of pretending a so-called “break” which is nothing more than an excuse to pass the pill.
Do you set rules in advance: a deadline (one week? two? A month ==> don’t go beyond that, it’s no longer called a break).
We do not take a break alone, both spouses must be in line with each other and be both aware of the unhappiness that has settled comfortably in their couple to rot it.
A break can save your couple (Taking a break with your couple)
A break can be beneficial only if the decision has been made by both partners.
Distancing one’s distance allows one to take a step back from one’s couple, to see our real needs, our desires, to see whether or not one is able to imagine a future with or without HIM.
Generally, during a break, we test our feelings. The questions abound in our head and the answers become clearer and clearer over time because the other is not there to bias them. Do I really miss him or is it the habit? Do I feel like kissing him, touching him, breathing him or do I just want to fall asleep in his arms because I don’t know how to sleep alone anymore? Why did we get to this point? Do I still like it? Why could we not avoid a break? Do its qualities take precedence over its flaws…?
The break sometimes helps to revive the passion of the beginnings. Indeed, the feeling of abandonment but especially of loss of the one we love can revive violent feelings that had been buried in oblivion for a little while! Everyone realizes that life without the other is bland and the reunion promises to be torrid.
The positive testimony of Laura, 24 years old: (Taking a break with your couple)
It’s been four years since I was in a relationship with Sylvain. The first year was passionate, magical, strangely perfect. We were happy together, at any time of the day, always happy to be glued. Only, when we moved in together, things got a little tough. The daily life has taken up too much space and we all know what happens next. I felt like I didn’t like it anymore. I wanted to be alone, to be free, I stayed as long as possible with my friends in the evening to avoid finding him. I didn’t want him anymore. I was desperate, unable to understand how a love as intense as the one we had experienced could turn into an unbearably wey routine. I ended up, after more than a year of doubt, I would like to make it clear, by asking him to take a break. He did not understand at the time. He told me that he was happy with me, that he did not see the problem. The routine suited him. Tolerant and open he still accepted my decision. I went to live a week with a friend without having heard from her. He was playing the game so well that I was afraid of losing him. Alone in front of myself, I realized that it was I, we, who had made this routine something boring but that I loved it and that’s what mattered. The first month I came back was strange, I knew I had to move things forward, I had become aware of a lot of things during this week but I didn’t know how to put the solutions in place. In the end, it happened naturally. We started planning weekends, outings, visits… And as strange as it may seem, I felt better and better. Today, I clearly found with Sylvain the passion of the beginnings, perhaps even better because the obstacles we overcame strengthened our love.
And yes, when you live together, a break can be even more useful than usual! What could be more normal than feeling suffocated after a certain period of living together? A little freedom is often enough to realize that you no longer want a single life!
But a break can also end badly… ..(Taking a break with your couple)…
Taking a break can quickly turn into a nightmare. Imagine the situation: you want to take a break, but he does not agree. He resents you and takes this break as a pretext to look elsewhere. You come back to him with open arms, having realized that you love him more than anything and you discover that he has met someone… others.
After the break, the complicity you had may have taken a shot of old. It is indeed not easy to spend several weeks without news of the other, without knowing his schedule, his associates …
As I said above, taking a break to disguise a break is useless. Repeated breaks, for example, are the clearest sign of a real difficulty to break, but also of a love that has become non-existent. The break then becomes an unsaved frustration as it continues to give vain hope to the already broken couple. (Taking a break with your couple)
Don’t use the break as a love strategy of the genre: I’m going to leave for two weeks so that he realizes how crazy he is about me and how he will never be able to live without me. Because, if that’s how you see it, he may see it differently. Your partner may take a liking to his freedom and no longer want you when you dive back into his arms.
To conclude, the break is a double-edged sword: if it can revive a passion that had been extinguished for some time, it can also definitively break a relationship. So take the time to think!
And you, have you ever taken a break? How did it end?